Donny Deploys National Guard to Washington DC for Imaginary Crime Wave
Analysis of Federalization of D.C. Police and National Guard Deployment
Assault on Democracy Authoritarian RiskRationale
The federalization of the police and deployment of the National Guard in response to an alleged crime emergency, despite declining crime rates, reflects a pattern of militarization against citizens and centralization of authority in the executive branch. This action can undermine democratic norms and public accountability.
Remember that insurrection Donny started on January 6th back in 2021? You might also remember how Donny refused to deploy the National Guard for that, for the very sort of event that they exist for.
Well four years later, for no reason at all, Donny decided now was the best time to deploy them. There's zero justification for doing this.
- Crime is at a 30 year low in DC
- There's no mass protest or threat of violence
- There's no precedent for doing it
Still, Donny held one of his rambling Big Boy press conferences to make the announcement:
"This is Liberation Day in DC, and we’re going to take our capital back. We’re taking it back,"
- Donny
Oh joy, another liberation day, after the Tariff one we had back in April. He blabbered on incoherently for 90 fucking minutes. Seriously, it was pure drivel, talking about scrubbing the steps outside properties and other nonsense amongst false claims about his achievements.
Why are the press not calling this rubbish out? Can someone, anyone, just step up and ask him "What the actual fuck are you talking about, you gibbering old geriatric?". I mean at this point, surely even his own clown appointments can see how he's deteriorated.
Between the random stream of consciousness emitted from King Don's mouth, Donny also said that he intends to remove the capital’s homeless population, but of course had no details as to how that would be implemented or any semblance of a plan.
Because when you're a simple minded cretin like Donny, you can president the shit out of things on vibes alone. Complex and nuanced social issues like crime, law and order, homelessness can all be massively simplified with a pointless show of force that will achieve fuck all.
And he initially announced his intention to 'dismiss' the homeless via his fucking app. Because of course the homeless are all glued to that and will oblige his every command:
So what on earth is the real motive? It's hard to know, it could be that Donny just wanted another authoritarian display of power. Perhaps it's to serve as another distraction because his name is all over the Epstein files. Or perhaps it's all part of his dementia, he just makes these awful whimsical decisions and all his clowns immediately dance for him.
The one thing we know for sure, is it's nothing to do with solving an imaginary crime wave that absolutely isn't happening.
The Handmaid’s Tale, But Make It Pentagon Policy
Analysis of Pete Hegseth's Action
Assault on Democracy Authoritarian RiskRationale
By endorsing the repeal of women's suffrage, Hegseth's action directly undermines the principle of equal voting rights, a cornerstone of democracy. This aligns with efforts to restrict civil liberties and indicates a manipulation of national identity that targets specific groups, in this case, women.
In case you thought Donny’s clown car administration couldn’t sink any lower, Defense Secretary and town drunk Pete Hegseth has decided to spend his free time sharing videos of pastors from a Christian nationalist church - and not just any sermon, but one calling for the repeal of women’s right to vote.
Yes, you read that correctly. The guy in charge of America’s military apparently thinks the problem with the country is that women get to have a say in it.
This isn’t “old-fashioned values.” This is straight-up Handmaid’s Tale cosplay, endorsed by one of the highest-ranking officials in the government. And it’s not some fringe nutjob doing this on Facebook Live — it’s the Secretary of Defense.
Of course, Donny will probably call it “interesting” or “thought-provoking,” which is his code for “I like this idea but I’ll let my minions test the waters first.”
We are not living in ordinary times.
Announced that gold would not be subjected to U.S. tariffs, ending speculation that gold bullion might become entangled in a wider global trade dispute.
President Dipshit has once again proven that policy decisions in his White House are driven less by strategy and more by whatever shiny object catches his eye.
This week, Donny decided to spare gold from tariffs — a sudden U-turn that sent the bullion markets breathing a sigh of relief. Why? Because just days earlier, a ruling from U.S. Customs and Border Protection had floated the idea of country-specific tariffs on gold bars, threatening to throw global supply chains into chaos, especially in places like Switzerland — the world’s gold-refining capital.
But let’s be real: this wasn’t about stabilizing international trade or protecting the economy. This is Donny we’re talking about — a man whose idea of interior design is “more gold, everywhere, all the time.” The guy is basically a magpie in a bad suit.
So yes, the gold stays safe. Not because it’s good for America, but because King Donny just can’t bring himself to tax his favorite shiny thing.
And as always - this is offical because Donny says so via his shitty app:
