Donny's Diary

Dear Diary, today was another BIG day! The Trump administration is making waves, folks! You won't believe this! We told Harvard—yes, Harvard—to CUT their terrible contracts! That's right, we're taking a stand against racial discrimination and not protecting our fantastic Jewish students. They should be thanking us—because nobody does it better!

And speaking of thank yous, I’m working on pardoning the reality stars Todd and Julie Chrisley—what a couple! They got caught in the big bad world of bank fraud, but who cares? Their treatment was HARSH, folks, just like how they treat me. Very unfair! It's called justice, but we know it's a rigged game—only I can fix it!

Then we've got Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth—fantastic guy, really! But wow, someone's got an illegal wiretap issue! This sounds familiar, just like the way the Democrats do things! Totally unbelievable. But we’re not worried. We’re WINNING.

Now, let’s talk about deportations! No due process? Who needs it! I want to send people to South Sudan like it’s a vacation. Just imagine the liberals crying over it! Can’t wait! It’s called making America tough again!

Senator Tuberville is running for governor now. Big move! He’s just like me, taking his winning strategies straight to Alabama! Speaking of winning, the Republicans passed a bill to protect my beautiful policies from those rogue judges! They can shove their injunctions—what a ridiculous word! This is a power-play, folks—my power!

Then there’s Elon Musk, my buddy! Sales are sinking over in Europe—49%, can you believe it? It's because of all those people who like to criticize him. Totally unfair! Think about it!

Can't forget about our embassies halting student visas! We are expanding social media review—who doesn’t want a little snooping? It’s all about security, folks! They can’t be trusted.

So here’s to making America GREAT again, one crazy move at a time! The Democrats are a MESS, and Biden is just sitting there like a sad puppy! SAD!