Donny's Dystopia - The Mad King
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Day 286: Halloween Horrors and Holy Wars: The Don's Double Dose of Chaos

Saturday, November 1, 2025

Dozy Don Sleeping

'Peace President' Threatens to Invade Nigeria

Donny is still reeling after not being awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. And keen to show why he was so worthy, he's threatening to invade Nigeria.

Donny took to social media to threaten military action in Nigeria, ordering the 'Department of War' to “prepare options” for intervention over what he called “horrific anti-Christian persecution.”

It was classic Donny: loud, impulsive, and dangerously ignorant. Within minutes of his post, diplomatic circles from Washington to Abuja were scrambling. Nigeria — Africa’s largest democracy, biggest economy, and a crucial U.S. security partner — suddenly found itself staring down the barrel of an American president’s religious crusade rhetoric.

Donny also announced Nigeria’s addition to the State Department’s “Countries of Particular Concern” list for religious persecution, a move experts described as both politically motivated and grossly misinformed.

Because here’s the thing: the violence in Nigeria isn’t a simple story of Christians versus Muslims.

It’s a messy, decades-long conflict driven by land disputes, climate stress, resource scarcity, and government dysfunction — not divine war. But nuance has never been The Don’s strong suit.

“We will not stand by while Christians are slaughtered in Africa,” Donny declared on his. shitty app, framing the issue as a one-sided genocide and vowing “swift and decisive action.”

Of course, that’s not what’s actually fucking happening. Both Christians and Muslims have been victims of the brutal violence plaguing Nigeria’s central and northern regions. Attacks have come from a mix of armed groups, including criminal gangs, jihadist militias, and local militias defending farmland.

To paint it as a holy war, said one analyst, “is not just wrong — it’s dangerous.” The Nigerian government, unsurprisingly, pushed back hard. In a statement from Abuja, officials reaffirmed Nigeria’s commitment to protecting all citizens, rejecting Donny's characterization as “false, inflammatory, and deeply unhelpful.”

“Nigeria is not a religious state and does not tolerate violence against any faith community,” the government said. “We urge our partners to approach these issues with understanding, not provocation.”

Translation: please don’t bomb us for Twitter clout.

The timing of Donny's outburst couldn’t be worse. Nigeria is already battling multiple security crises — including Islamist insurgents in the northeast, farmer-herder conflicts in the middle belt, and separatist movements in the south. The last thing it needs is an impulsive American president threatening to turn it into the next Iraq.

Even U.S. officials were reportedly blindsided. One State Department source told reporters that “the president’s statement did not reflect current interagency discussions,” which is diplomatic-speak for “he went rogue again.”

Human rights experts and regional analysts have warned that militarizing the issue could inflame tensions and risk fueling the very sectarianism Donny claims to oppose.

Meanwhile, religious-right figures in the U.S. — Trump’s most loyal base — are already cheering him on, framing his comments as proof that he’s “defending global Christianity.” For The Don, it’s another chance to stoke the culture wars while pretending to play savior on the world stage.

But for Nigerians, it’s a terrifying reminder of how American ignorance can have deadly consequences abroad.

If history is any guide, this is less about “defending faith” and more about performative power politics — a man desperate to look strong while millions at home go hungry during a government shutdown he caused.

So while experts plead for diplomacy and Nigeria urges calm, The Don is once again waving the saber, mistaking complexity for weakness and human lives for applause lines.

Because for Donny, it’s never about solving problems. It’s about looking like a conqueror — even if it means setting the world on fire to prove it. And then demanding the Nobel Peace Prize.


Trick, Treat, or Terror: The Mad King’s ICE Raids Turn Halloween into a Nightmare in Chicago and L.A.

Halloween night — a time for costumes, candy, and community — turned into a night of fear for immigrant families across the country.

Under the flickering glow of jack-o’-lanterns, federal agents descended on Chicago and Los Angeles, turning neighborhood streets into flashpoints of confrontation.

In Evanston, Illinois, ICE agents detained two people following a car accident, sparking immediate outrage and tense clashes with residents. Mayor Daniel Biss condemned the raids in a blistering statement, calling them “assaults on our residents and on our values.”

“These actions make our communities less safe and less humane,” Biss said. “No one should have to fear federal agents while walking home from trick-or-treating.”

But fear was precisely what The Don’s government delivered.

In Los Angeles, ICE agents detained two house painters, a moment captured in a chilling photograph showing the men in handcuffs as Halloween revelers looked on. Nearby protesters shouted “ICE out of L.A.!” while riot police formed barricades, their flashing lights casting long shadows across suburban streets once meant for children’s laughter.

The raids, coordinated across multiple cities, were part of Donny's administration’s escalating immigration crackdown, which has blurred the line between law enforcement and political theater.

According to federal sources, additional agents were deployed to assist ICE in “holiday operations,” a phrase critics are calling Orwellian.

To call it bad optics would be generous.

While millions of American families were handing out candy, The Don’s agents were snatching up workers, parents, and neighbors — in some cases, in front of their children.

For many, the choice of timing felt deliberate — a message from an administration that has made cruelty not just a policy, but a brand.

Civil rights groups slammed the raids as “psychological warfare against immigrant communities,” accusing the administration of weaponizing fear on one of the few nights meant to unite neighborhoods.

“Halloween is supposed to be about masks and pretend monsters,” said activist María Hinojosa of Latino USA. “But the real monsters came from Washington.”

The raids also exposed deep fractures between local governments and federal authorities.

In Chicago and L.A., mayors and police chiefs have repeatedly asked ICE to coordinate in ways that don’t endanger community trust — requests the Trump administration has ignored.

Instead, federal agents have become fixtures of intimidation, turning local policing into a stage for The Mad King’s authoritarian performance art.

And while the administration insists these raids target “criminal aliens,” local reports show that many of those detained had no criminal records at all. They were painters, laborers, parents — people whose only “crime” was seeking a better life.

The images coming out of Halloween 2025 will linger: children dressed as superheroes watching silently as their neighbors are dragged away in handcuffs. The irony is grotesque — a night meant for imagination and innocence twisted into a show of state power.

For immigrant families across America, the message was clear: No holiday is safe. No moment is sacred. No one is beyond The Don’s reach.

Once again, the administration proved that its true talent lies not in governing, but in terrorizing — turning every civic tradition into a political weapon.

And so, as candy bowls emptied and porch lights flickered out, millions went to bed not with sugar highs, but with the bitter taste of fear — yet another reminder that under The Mad King’s rule, even Halloween isn’t safe from horror.